Hey guys. Just got done watching the first night of Wrestlemania 36 and… um… well, these are strange times. For anyone who doesn’t watch wrestling, they performed it in their practice facility with no audience. So everyone comes out hamming it up for the crowd… that doesn’t exist. Then while they’re wrestling there’s absolutely no crowd reaction. And you hear everything the wrestlers are saying. It was also all pre-recorded. Now I don’t watch wrestling much throughout the year, I just use Wrestlemania as my yearly homage to my childhood, but even for me it was weird as hell.
The headline match was Undertaker vs AJ Styles in a “Boneyard Match.”
But Chris, what’s a “Boneyard Match?” Glad you asked!
They had the match in a graveyard. That’s all. But on a night of pre-recorded matches, they Hollywood’ed the f**k out of it, and it was basically the big final showdown between the good and bad guy at the end of the movie. And it totally worked and was awesome (after much calculation on what I had just watched). Listen.. Undertaker has ABSOLUTELY NO BUSINESS getting in a ring anymore. And I don’t mean that’s he’s not a great character, or hasn’t earned the right to work as long as he f**king wants to. I mean that the man can barely walk, nonetheless be throwing 300 pound men around. But I think it worked having him perform on a Hollywood stage. It got all the good GREAT stuff he’s still got left, and allowed us to ignore all the bad. And if you’re interested in other opinions, take a look at #boneyardmatch on Twitter. Plenty of opinions, mostly positive. Even better, find a way to watch it. It’s an event.
And while I’m at it… God bless the WWE at this exact moment. They could have easily canceled it, postponed it, whatever. But they gave us an outlet on a Saturday evening sitting in our homes with nothing much else to do. They gave us the glorious ridiculousness and stupidity of professional wrestling, and with everything going on I think this country will take it. Thanks guys.
In other news, we’re still chilling in the Sedona, AZ area of the world. We’re still deciding what the hell we’re going to do, but we’re leaning heavily towards a drive back east when our reservation here is up. If our original plan was in action, we’d be on our way to Memphis at this exact moment. Specifically, we’d be parked somewhere around Amarillo, TX to spend the night.
As for now, our plan is to get to Cape Cod by early May, hopefully as they’re coming down the other side of this roller coaster ride. We’ll be hanging out there until Jenny gets the smoke signal that a nephew is on his way, at which point she’ll be hopping in a rental car and heading straight down to Long Island (which is also hopefully going through the other side of this mess as well.) After that, the hope is we can hop back on the original itinerary as we would have started on Cape Cod beginning in June.
::fingers crossed::
In the meantime we’re keeping ourselves busy. As I was sitting around drinking beer and watching grown ass adults throw themselves around a wrestling ring, Jenny made us pasta from scratch. Seriously, SCRATCH. Like, rolling egg yolks into flour. Who does that?!?
Needless to say, it was delicious. Soon she’ll be baking cupcakes… and I will weigh 250 pounds by the end of this. #notcomplaining
Also in the news, we made a trip up to Flagstaff. Made a nice easy hike up to the top of Slate Mountain, which kinda just gives you the same awesome view the whole way up, so not more than a few photos necessary. Then we went to Lumberyard Brewery where we picked up some food and beer, I had the best burger I’ve had so far on this trip, and drank my hefe walking around Buffalo Park. Jenny ran here 12 years ago with her college team, and we had the fun thought experiment of telling her the context of how and when she’d be back for her second visit…
“You’ll be back here with a boyfriend of 10 years, but you won’t be married or have kids… like not even close. You’ll also be driving around the country in an RV and not working at all… OH, and you’ll be in the middle of a global virus pandemic that has killed over 64,000 people.”
(When I showed her this before posting – so I don’t get in trouble – her response: “well, I’d definitely believe the not being married or having kids.”)
So that’s it, I guess. There’s a song I had been promising Jenny I’d learn to sing with her for karaoke for about 8 years now, and I never did. Since karaoke is no longer a thing (awwwwww, remember places?!?!) we may just record our own music video, obviously extremely drunk because why the f**k not be extremely drunk with everything going on. So keep an eye out for that I suppose.
To finish this out, please enjoy a video of George being a f**king idiot, a selfie on TOP OF A MOUNTAIN, and Buffalo Park.
(Also, Rick and Morty marathon Monday night on Adult Swim. You’re welcome.)
